Bye, Sarah!

Adios, Ms. Palin.

Oh I know, you’re still very much alive and squawking, but you’re dead to me: From now on, I won’t click on any articles about you. I won’t watch you on TV. I won’t purchase magazines that do in-depth, unauthorized exposés on your alleged narcissistic personality disorder. I will not reward the media for talking about you.

You know that old question, If a tree falls in a forest, and no one’s around to hear it, does it still make a sound?

I think the only reason you’re still around, making lots of sound, is because the “lamestream media” that you hate so much really likes you. And why wouldn’t they? Whether it’s your latest hypocrisy or misspelled tweet, you’re a no-brainer for news stories.

I know that the media are salivating over you right now, waiting to see if you’ll throw your hat in the ring for the presidential election in 2012. To that I give a big ol’ PSHAW. You’re not the brightest bulb in the box, but you’re smart enough to know that you got a pretty sweet gig going on right now, and being president is real WORK! You can’t do it from the comfort of a home studio. Right now you can “write” books and charge thousands of dollars for speaking tours in between spotting mama grizzlies (on camera), all at your leisure.

Meanwhile, your winkin’, tweetin’ schtick has gone from annoying to old. We know there isn’t much more to your career than this. You’ve said all you could possibly say. But you keep on saying it.

So Ima let you finish. And Ima turn down the volume. To mute.

–By Tara Cavanaugh

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