The best responses to Todd Akin’s ‘legitimate rape’ bullshit

Don’t you just love when politicians say they “misspoke”? Like, wouldn’t it be better just to say they had a stroke or were drinking?

For example, take this “misspoken” gem: “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try and shut that whole thing down,” said current rep in the U.S. Effing House of Representatives Todd Akin as he tried to defend his stance on abortion to a TV station. If I were his PR rep I’d blame the booze.

Akin’s suffered a lot of political setbacks in his Senate race since then––namely huge financial setbacks as GOP funders run away screaming, but dude’s digging in his heels, refusing to quit and instead offering some lame apology to the people (but none to Science, Biology, or FACTS).

Here are some of the best, definitely not misspoken responses since then:

President Obama: “Rape is rape. The idea that we should be parsing and qualifying and slicing what types of rape we’re talking about doesn’t make sense to the American people and certainly doesn’t make sense to me… We shouldn’t have a bunch of politicians, the majority of whom are men, making healthcare decisions on behalf of women.” (Washington Post)

Wall Street Journal Editorial: “Mr. Akin has sunk his own ship.” (WSJ.com)

Sen. Scott Brown, R-Mass.: “As a husband and father of two young women, I found Todd Akin’s comments about women and rape outrageous, inappropriate and wrong. There is no place in our public discourse for this type of offensive thinking. Not only should he apologize, but I believe Rep. Akin’s statement was so far out of bounds that he should resign the nomination for U.S. Senate in Missouri.” (ABC)

A DOCTOR: “A further problem with proclamations like Akin’s, though, is what they sound like to women who have been raped. If you believe what he does, then anyone who did get pregnant wasn’t ‘legitimately’ raped. Moreover, it belies a willful ignorance of science. Rape has occurred in history time and time again. Women get pregnant from it. This is known. There is no debate to be had. (CNN)

Katie J.M. Baker: “For decades, conservatives have claimed that women can’t get pregnant from ‘legitimate’ rape thanks to their wise, all-knowing uteri, psychic ‘juices’ and Spidey Sense-like ‘secretions.’ (Hmm, if legislators can applaud our vaginas for being so omniscient, how come they can’t let us control them?)” (Jezebel’s “Official Guide to Legitimate Rape”)

“Akin” himself: “I am an evil, fucked-up man who should never have been elected to the United States Congress, and anyone who would vote for me is probably a pretty big fucking dumbshit, too.” (The Onion)

–TC

Free to be banging baby-free

#nothanks

Hi, I’m Jackie. I take birth control. I don’t take it because it helped save my life or because it cured some medical mystery happening inside my body. I take it because I like to have sex without repercussions that come in the shape of an infant.

If you’re sporting a uterus, chances are you’ve noticed all of this political commotion surrounding women’s rights and the usage of birth control. Thankfully, there have been some badass women who stepped forward to tell their stories about how birth control has solved their health issues and even saved their lives. These stories give validity to this drug and also a scientific “go fuck yourself” to all of the men that are trying take this right away from us. Perhaps if these men see what a useful medication the pill can be, they stop labeling all modern women as harlots who are just looking for a good time. With that being said, what about that harlot who is looking to have a good time? Is she any less important to this equation of birth control validation? Continue reading

Pill Thrilled: How birth control gave me my life back

I wonder if any of the men summoned forth to testify on Darrell Issa’s congressional oversight committee on women’s health have ever collapsed in front of an ATM. While I’m not nearly as much an expert on these men’s lives as they are on me and my feminine health, I’m going to safely venture as to guess the answer to my query is a resounding “no.” Continue reading

Birth control: it’s more than family planning for me. It’s life planning too.

My attempts to keep track of my life are chronicled in these pages.

I. Plan. Everything. I’m almost as Type A as you can get. I pack my lunch the night before. I’m allergic to procrastinating. I’m the only person I knew in college who didn’t pull all-nighters. I’m never without my day planner and the calendar on my iPhone beeps at me incessantly.

Like many ambitious young women, I’m juggling a lot: career aspirations, relationships, stress. You know the phrase, “Life is what happens when you were busy making other plans?” Yeah. I plan as much as possible so that I can handle whatever unexpected hurdles life throws my way.

So it’s no surprise that I use birth control, right? Continue reading

Me Versus The Pill

Getting a really bad period can feel almost worse than this crazy fool yelling at you.

“I’m not going to pay for your birth control just so you can have sex.”

My dad said that to me when I was 22 years old and on birth control for the first time. I still remember the setting in perfect detail. He yelled it at me while on a family vacation with my mom, brother, aunt, uncle and cousins. And yes, they were all standing by.

Continue reading